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TIPS ON MOVING OUT SURREPTITIOUSLY TO AVOID ABUSE

  • Be sure he is gone. It is best if he is far enough away that he cannot get back in time if he is alerted.
  • Be prepared for the possibility he may have alerted a neighbor to keep an eye on things for him.
  • Move fast. Make sure all arrangements are made ahead of time and the timing is closely coordinated. Have enough people there at once to get the job done fast (note, however, the more commotion you cause, the greater the likelihood of being caught).
  • Identify what you want to take before you go so you do not have a delay in deciding.
  • Take what you must have; if you leave it, kiss it good bye.
  • Be careful who you tell about the move. You can never be sure who might squeal on you.
  • If you have a connection with local law enforcement, let them know what you are doing. Law enforcement are fickle on this issue. I have had some prevent a move when they were alerted by the other spouse.
  • Be careful not to damage things or to destroy the home. This will be used against you. You might even want to take pictures of what you left and the condition you left the house in.
  • If you take everything, be prepared for a violent reaction and for use of that against you in court.
  • If he catches you, be careful to avoid a breach of the peace. You may have to abandon the attempt in order to avoid violence or arrest.
  • Make sure you have people with you who can either control him physically or emotionally if he should catch you. Make sure everyone with you has the sense to avoid a breach of the peace or a fight.
  • Either parent has equal access to children until a court order is entered. You may take your child with you, but, remember, if you leave your child somewhere to which he has access without trespass, he can go get the child back. (Mississippi law)